Crushing Conflict - From Tension to Teamwork
- Leslie Speas
- Apr 11
- 3 min read
Conflict is inevitable in the workplace. When you have diverse personalities, communication styles, and competing priorities, tension can and will arise. While conflict can be uncomfortable, it doesn’t have to be destructive. In fact, when managed well, it can lead to stronger relationships, better collaboration, and improved problem-solving.
As a leader or HR professional, your role in navigating conflict is critical. You set the tone, provide structure, and model how to address issues constructively.
Strategies to help you approach conflict between employees with skill and grace:
1. Act Early—Don’t Wait for It to Blow Up
One of the most common mistakes leaders make is hoping conflict will “blow over.” Spoiler: it rarely does. Unresolved tension often festers, creating resentment, silos, or turnover. Pay attention to early warning signs like sarcasm, avoidance, or team members "venting" behind closed doors.
When you sense friction, a simple check-in like, “I’ve noticed some tension—how can I support you in resolving it?” can open the door to productive conversation.
2. Listen and Coach Before You Solve
It’s tempting to jump in and fix the issue but resist that urge to do so. Start by hearing each person’s perspective fully. Often, employees just want to feel heard and understood. Ask open-ended questions:
What happened from your point of view?
How did it impact you?
What do you need going forward?
Listen with empathy and without judgment. Sometimes, just creating a space for people to talk honestly is half the battle.
I recommend trying to coach the employee(s) involved to solve the issue directly. However, sometimes that doesn’t work, or the relationship is too far gone to be effective. In that case, move to #3.
3. Facilitate a Conversation
If a direct conversation between employees is needed, set the stage for success:
Meet in a neutral location
Set ground rules (respect, no interruptions, confidentiality)
Consider having an HR professional or Consultant facilitate
Share a neutral, high-level summary of what was heard in individual conversations (held before the meeting)
Ask what’s going well and what causes tension and frustration in the relationship
Guide them in co-creating a Collaboration Working Agreement
Discuss accountability and next steps
Focus the conversation on behavior and impact—not on who’s “right” or “wrong.” Guide employees to move from blame to collaboration.
4. Don’t Ignore Patterns or Deeper Issues
If the same employee is repeatedly involved in conflict, or if the issue seems systemic (e.g., toxic communication norms, unclear roles), dig deeper. There may be a need for team development, training, or even discipline.
Chronic conflict should never be normalized. Your team deserves a safe and respectful environment to do their best work.
5. Foster a Culture of Feedback and Respect
The best long-term solution? Build a culture where feedback, candor, and respect are the norm. Train your leaders to have courageous conversations. Provide tools and language for employees to resolve issues directly and respectfully.
When trust is high and psychological safety is present, conflict becomes less about drama—and more about growth.
Final Thoughts
Conflict is not a sign of failure—it’s a sign of human beings working together. As a leader or HR professional, you have the opportunity to model calm, curiosity, and compassion in how you manage it.
Need assistance or training in conflict resolution? Reach out! leslie@influencehrconsulting.com.
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